V
You don’t remember how long you remained there, adrift in that sea, a fish in those twin oceans. All you know is that what you were before, you will never be again, and what you are now, is something greater. Something truer, more human.
Death showed you many things in those waters, and many of those things are yours alone to know; but the truth you feel most deeply is that they are not an enemy, but a wise and courageous friend.
Casting your mind back to the forest, you watch the memory again with your true eyes.
You see the way that Death lovingly cared for the hummingbird all its life, following the golden thread toward it slowly, taking care not to pull a moment too soon.
You see the way that the hummingbird flew ever-forward, knowing who it was greeting, and living more fully for that knowing.
You see the way that in that final moment, when Death broke the thread, the spirit shape of the bird shimmered as a thousand sun-bound wings - each taking their place in the perfect, golden dawn.
SONG: BENEDICTION
a closing prayer, a blessing
We bloom for a spring,
and then we expire
We bloom for a spring,
and then we expire
Love is an ancient bird
Taking to the sky
We bloom for a spring,
and then we expire
But death is not the end,
its just a sigh
That breathes us from the lungs
into the sky.
INTENTION
RITUAL: COLLECTING MEMORY, DREAMING FUTURE
I’ve been exploring memory as immortality. Memory as a way of not only preserving the things, people & places we love, but also continuing relationships with them. I suppose in a way, this forest funeral is part of that. Collecting memory, but also dreaming new ways.
As a ritual of collecting memory, opening a dialogue, and transforming grief into art, I’ve been making zines.
A zine is really just a small book… and in this ritual, I’m going to show you how to make one, as an act of creative alchemy.
Zines can be digital or physical - it’s completely up to you. I’ve listed supplies for physical zine-making here, but digital zines can be made using a word processor or image/photo editing software - even on your phone.
GATHER:
Paper (a single A4 piece is enough for the instructions below)
Pens, pencils; things to write & draw with
Photographs, cutouts from books/magazines
Scissors
Anything you want to adorn your zine with; leaves, string, fabric…
INCLUDE (examples):
Any writing you’ve done throughout the forest funeral
Photos of your Gathering altar
Photos of loved ones, special places, memories
Your sigil
Journal entries
Collages on the themes of grief, hope, transformation, alchemy
Poetry, stream-of-consciousness writing, even single words that are meaningful for you
THE RITUAL:
Once all your materials are gathered, spread them out in front of you. Take a moment to feel into the themes present; are there any connecting ideas? Any recurring patterns? How do you feel when you look at them?
Set an intention for the zine, and also for the process of making the zine itself. Maybe you’d like it to be a place where you can explore your own emotional landscape, or maybe its a place to commemorate and collect memories of a loved one. Take a moment to speak that energy in yourself, and call it forward. Or, call in the loved one/s, and dedicate it to them, ask them to be present.
Using the template & instructions below, map out & create your zine. Feel the way that an act of creation is able to transmute and alchemise emotion and memory, and give birth to something new.
This is a life cycle in itself.
RITUAL: SURRENDER
We’ve been charging this sigil together for the last ten days, focusing our personal intentions, and the collective intention of alchemising the pain of the past in to joy.
Now, in an act of alchemy, we are going to surrender it to the elements; to fire, water, earth, or air.
We don’t need to use the original drawing of the sigil. We can draw a new one specifically for this part of the alchemical process, so if you’ve drawn your sigil on to something precious that you’d like to keep - keep it!
It’s also okay, even recommended, to keep a copy of the sigil and continue working with it as a symbol of ongoing transformation.
THE RITUAL:
Draw the sigil again. This time, feel in to what has shifted for you in the last 10 days. What new space may have opened up? What have you allowed yourself to feel?
Take note of the thoughts & emotions you have toward the sigil itself. How has your relationship with the symbol changed? What thoughts enter your mind when you see it now? There will be valuable clues & insights here into your journey with your intention.
Feel in to which element wants to assist you in this part of the process. Notice if you feel drawn to fire, water, earth, or air. This may come in the form of a thought, a feeling, or a sign - perhaps a gentle breeze lets you know air wants to work with you, or the sound of a dripping tap is water coming forward. Trust your instinct.
Address the element in whichever way feels true for you. You can speak aloud to it, or simply acknowledge it in your mind. Thank the element for coming forward to assist you, and take a moment to feel into the ways this element might be speaking to you in other areas of your life. These will be personal, and multi-faceted. For example:
- Fire could be trying to help you set boundaries, or burn away things that aren’t serving you.
- Water may be asking you to drop into the depth of your emotions, or move more fluidly through life.
- Earth might be calling you to ground in to your physical body, or focus on your health.
- Air may be letting you know that you’re overthinking, that spirit is trying to speak with you, or that you need to make a change.Now, it’s time to surrender this first journey with the sigil to the elements - calling in a new chapter of continued alchemy & transformation. Using your elemental ally, transform the drawing of the sigil.
- If working with fire, surrender the sigil to a flame, such as a candle or a campfire.
- If working with water, let the sigil go in to a natural body of water like a river or the ocean, or even in to a bowl of water.
- If working with earth, bury the sigil, or plant it in a garden.
- If working with air, let the sigil go on the wind, or drop it from a high place (such as a tree, a cliffside, or a balcony).As the sigil is surrendered, inhale deeply and recall your intention for this experience… and then exhale, and let it go, trusting that this journey has been exactly what it needed to be for you, and that the work is being taken care of for you and through you.
Thank your elemental ally again, and set a new intention for the next chapter of your journey.
The ritual is now complete.
CONNECT
The forest funeral experience has come to a close… but the Dream Army Discord will be open & waiting for you HERE. I’ll be opening up all of the hidden channels now, and there is a lot of magic to unfold together into the future. Think secret missions, collaborative art, soft-hearted sharing… and of course a healthy dose of absurdity and (sacred!) nonsense.
The Forest Funeral channels will remain open for you to share your Rituals & Reflections in your own time. There’s no rush. I also encourage you to share them with my via email at any time.
If you make a memory zine… please share it with me! I would love to see what you create.
You’re already part of the Dream Army mailing list… so you’ll be hearing from me. I hope to hear from you, too.
FAREWELL
I thought for a long time about what I would say to you, when we reached the last part of the forest funeral.
My whole life, I’ve struggled with goodbyes - and there has been a lot of them. I’m rarely graceful, rarely composed, and nearly always tearful when it comes to farewells. Even when they’re small, and temporary… even when they’re me typing this message to you.
Making (and then holding on to) this record over the last two years has been a deep and complex journey. It’s brought shades of the emotional spectrum to my life that maybe weren’t even there before. It’s brought me here, to this moment right now.
So, although this is a farewell, I hope it can also be a greeting. To you, and our continued journey together… and also to the golden dawn peeking over the horizon, calling me on, to a new adventure.
Thank you for being here - really - and going deep with me. I’ll see you in the next chapter.
Softly,
Heirloome
